Alright
by defy-law
Summary: 'No matter how long it takes, I will save you.' A TYL! fic. TYL!80TYL!59 This story has been revised! Please R & R!


THIS STORY HAS BEEN REVISED! There have been no major changes, just little things I think makes it better.

Warning: Depression, a little fluff, boyXboy relationship, yaoi, (don't like, don't read), possible OOC-ness.

Pairing: TYL!80TYL!59

Inspiration: "Save You" Kelly Clarkson

Disclaimer: I do not own KHR! Or any of the characters. Nor do I own the song I used for inspiration.

Alright

Brown eyes watched through rain speckled glass as a dark figure walked towards a waiting cab. The figure lowered and closed the black umbrella as he slid into the back seat, silvery hair catching some of the wet drops before taking cover in the vehicle. His ears registered the car door slamming just a moment after his eyes before the yellow car drove off.

The scowl on the usually happy face deepened as he watched the man's distinct outline fade through the pouring rain.

Turning away from the now empty scene outside the window, the rain guardian made his way to a couch and sat. Hunched over with his elbows resting on his knees, he buried his face in his hands as the ache in his chest increased.

Every day he watched as his love left to visit the place that hurt him most. The sight he knew would meet his eyes when the Mafioso returned always made his stomach drop and every day that passed only made it worse. Whitnessing the other man's suffering was killing him.

Sighing, he reached for his phone. He scrolled through the numbers until he reached the right one and pressed 'call.' The electronic ring played in his ear before the line was picked up from the other end.

"What?"

The swordsman gave a sad smile at the forced anger in the answering voice. "Just wondering if you'll be back for dinner" His voice was hopeful, even though he already new the answer.

There was a pause before the man on the other end answered. "I don't know." Dark brows furrowed at the pain that was obvious, even through the phone. "Go ahead and eat without me."

Scowling again, the dark haired man let out a heavy breath. "Hayato, why do you keep doin-"

"Can we talk about this later?" The Mafioso interrupted.

"Yeah," Yamamoto could easily hear the strain in the other's voice. He must be close to his destination. "I love you," he tried. He _had_ to try.

"Yeah," was the cracked reply he got just before the line disconnected.

Setting the phone back down, he buried his face in his hands again. He knew better than to try calling him back or going after the Smokin' Bomb. It never went over well, nothing he could say or do would help.

He knew this was the repercussion for his own actions. It was something he caused, and he would have to live with what he did. He heaved a heavy sigh as the tears began to build up in his eyes.

_What was I thinking? I shouldn't have left. I knew what it would do to him and I still turned away. _He shuddered as the memory of Gokudera's begging voice screamed in his ears. Every echoed memory was like a stab in his already aching heart.

He sucked in a sharp breath and one hand clutched at the stitches of his chest.

He never meant to abandon the green-eyed man. Leaving was the only release he could find.

When his father was killed, the dark haired swordsman locked away the shadows building inside him. He didn't want to subject Tsuna and the others, especially Gokudera, to the darkness that threatened to consume him.

After some time, the swordsman felt as if the hurt and pain had finally abated. The weight he felt from his own remorse slowly chipped away until he no longer felt he was bearing the burden. He tore down the fences he'd built so high around himself, the fences that kept up the ever present smile for his friends. Finally showing real, true happiness, only to be sucked back into the darkness.

Only too soon after his father, Tsuna- his best friend, his boss, his family- was gunned down.

The shadows he thought were put to rest consumed him in an instant. He didn't want to deal with any of it.

So he left.

Instead of facing the things happening around him, instead of supporting the one he loved, he ran away.

He remembered now so clearly how broken up Gokudera was the day he found the packed bags at the door, though at the time it all seemed like a giant blur.

"_What's going on?" the silver haired Mafioso immediately demanded. His face was still red and puffy from the tears he'd shed in the last few days._

"_I'm leaving." _

_The stoic, emotionless voice was not something the smaller man was expecting. "W-what? What do you mean you're leaving? Where do you think you're going?"_

_The taller man could see the hysteria starting to crack through the other man's hard outer shell._

"_I'm going to Italy. I contacted Squalo last night. My flight leaves at 2:00."_

_Brown eyes looked lifelessly over the one small travel bag and the long brown box containing his sword._

"_No."_

_The lifeless gaze met heated green eyes. _

"_Gokudera…" Silver brows furrowed at the formal name. "It's too late, I'm leaving in just a few minutes."_

_There was a loud snap as a pale palm connected with a tanned cheek. "No! You can't leave." The pale hand reached and clamped around the back of the taller man's neck and pulled down so that their lips could meet. It was a hard, rough kiss, but Gokudera knew it was no use the moment his lips met cold ones, hard as stone and unresponsive._

_The taller man pushed back against shorter shoulders, keeping his eyes averted. "I'm sorry. I have to go." He grabbed the bag and packaged sword and walked out the door, refusing to look back as tears poured from the begging green eyes._

_He knew the smaller man was unsure of where they stood in life, in love. He knew the kiss was a way to find the answers he sought, but the swordsman was empty handed. He could do nothing in the way of giving an answer. _

_He loaded his things into the cab that had pulled up outside. Sliding into the back seat, he felt something on his cheek. He brushed a hand along the skin only to find tears falling freely._

_He thought of the broken look on the Mafioso's face, wishing he could save him. Save him from the pain, from the suffering._

_He wished he could promise everything would be alright, but he couldn't. Not yet. He had to save himself before he pulled anyone else from the shadows. _

Yamamoto woke with a start at the sound of a door closing, not remembering when he'd fallen asleep.

He glanced out the window to the darkening sky, surprised that's he'd slept through the whole day. His eyes moved to the doorway when a flash of silvercaught his eye.

"Hayato?" The man paused mid-step on his way pass the room, but didn't turn toward the man who'd called his name.

Yamamoto had been back in Japan, back in their home for almost two weeks, but it didn't help how abandoned the Mafioso felt since the day his dark haired lover walked out the door.

"Hayato, please." the rain guardian begged. He left his spot on the couch in favor of one closer to the smaller man. His dark eyes traveled the red, puffy profile. "I know that we can't pretend nothing's changed, but please, let me back in. Let me help you." He watched as fresh tears began to fall down the pale face.

Tan hands pulled on suit covered shoulders, enveloping him in the security of his arms. "I swear, Hayato. I swear I'm not going nowhere." He heard a huff at his bad grammar and a small, hopeful smile came to his lips. "I swear, it's gonna be alright.

He felt hands claw at his shirt as the sobs wracked the body in his arms.

_No matter how long it takes, I will save you. It's going to be all right._

_A/N: _In case you haven't figured it out, the place Gokudera is going is Tsuna's grave/casket/whatever you want to call it. I wrote this before the future arc was over, before we all knew Tsuna wasn't really dead. I hope you all enjoyed!

Please review.


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